16.03.2011

almost exactly one year since i started to pen down my thoughts again.its already 2011 in just a blink of eyes. its amazing how i maange to go through life with so much ambiguity and uncertainity! those question i asked myself in the past have not found themselves any answer and right now i just have even more questions!

lets talk about the world end 2012.12.21 haha how true is that i am not sure. but to certain extend it kept repeating/ appearing in my life that i start to belive that world end may come and it will come eventually weather be it in 2012 or some other years. but wouldn't be a pity if all the hard work we go through goes into the drain simply because of a world end? how do we strike a balance so that we can continue with life and do not feel that whatever we are going through are a waste of time. i dont know. i wish i have more time for whatever i feel like doing and not just reports and test. sharon says that at least during the process you are learning thus it s not a waste of time. but to me those precious time can be used to do other stuff. stuff which are more meaningful and can add more colours to my dull and reptitious life. somehow i am not as thrifty as in the past, i spend more now and do not really calculate or mull over if every peny i spent is worth it. i spend more now cause i know money isnt everything. i start to find a form venting my stress by buying stuff, shopping therapy they call it. but still i have my limits and i do stop within my capabilities. haha. whatever it is, world end is still an ambiguity.

friends, same old people whom i hang out with, perhaps only true friends like them will stay with me forever through out my life. people whom will walk with me through happiness and sadness, i do not need a tons of friends, just a few whom are close to heart will do. At least over the years, i have became more mature and have come to terms with this point. and i am happy. no grumbles, no complains. i love them and i am pretty sure they love me too. i am glad i became a less grumpy person. however for friends whom have just entered my life, i still hold a sense of defence against them. and they are the ones whom do not understand me and i do not undertsand and this is where the root of grumbles started all over again for instance right now is lena. for the rest of the peeps in uni, i have been immuned and it doesnt concern me much. perhaps only mg is that one i would wish to keep as a friend for life.

love have shown its vumerable/ugly side to me recently through the stories of my friends. it is so unpredictable and anything can happen irregardless of the promises that holds and the belief that everything will turn out fine and well. thing changes, human changed. its an inevitable fact that we have to accept. for me, i dont know what is love. but i do enjoy my company with sk and i hope to carry on my life with him. alhtough at times, my hearts wander, my mind flusters over other issue. but still i love him i know. its just moment of impluses that i have to overcome and get even with! wayy to go joyce! i know i can do it!

okay.. i am lazy to say more!

life ahead:
FYP. taiwan trip. aussi trip. china trip. first class honours(i hope!) and tons of work to catch up with JIAYOU!